How To Make Two Mismatched Schedules Work

Jimmy and I may be newlyweds, but the truth of the matter is that we barely see one another. As his mom says, “we are two ships passing in the night.”

Jimmy works a regular 8-5, sometimes 6 job, from Monday-Friday. I work from 12-10 Monday-Thursday and 12-4 on Fridays. The only person this schedule works for is Arthur, our dog. He’s never alone for too long.

However, what this means for Jimmy and I is that we see each other from 10-11 PM at night for an hour of playing catch-up when we’re both exhausted. I’m trying to calm down from work, and he’s trying to keep his eyes open. This hour just isn’t enough quality time, so we’re trying to do little things to help our situation. Here our a few tips if you have a similarly yucky schedule.

1. Kiss each other goodbye in the morning. Even though Jimmy gets up way before I do, he always kisses me goodbye and says I love you. I either respond or groan, but we have some contact in the morning. It’s nice to have any that little bit of contact.

2. Leave each other notes. A note on the counter, no matter how short, is a great way to keep the connection alive. I’m not talking about “Honey Do” notes either! I’m talking love notes.

3. Make small segments of time work for you. Sometimes we don’t even have time to grab lunch together, but I can drop coffee off at his house for a few minutes or he can drop dinner off for me. You’ve got to lower your standards and just take the time you can get.

4. No matter how tired you are at night, greet the person who walks in the door! This means so much.

5. Exchange e-mails and/or texts during the day. I know I don’t have time to do this every day, but it can really help keep communication flowing. Jimmy sends me funny and/or helpful articles and it gives us something to talk about later. It’s like we had a conversation during the day that we pick back up again in person.

6. Of course, make the most of your weekends! Make spending time with your partner a priority. We are more careful about how we spend our time on the weekends because we need quality time together. We can’t go to every social event and still have “us” time, so we have to pick and choose.

This weekend it’s a trip to Raleigh together! We’re going to The Melting Pot for our “dating” anniversary, a Christmas parade on Saturday, birthday party for my Beckton boy, and fun times with friends. Then to Farmville for a play together on Sunday. A good balance of time for just us and time for friends.

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